Dirty, Pretty Thing: Purple and Blue Language in Y.A.

I’m a sucker for purple prose. I’m not proud of it, but alliteration makes me swoon, as does a prettily described sunset or milkmaid. (Some favorite examples appear in Proust’s Swann’s Way, a five-hundred-page book about a cookie). But my love of flowery language is, I think, just another symptom of English Major-itis: the desire to write and read Great Works of Art as opposed to Stories. And though they’re often fun to write, beautiful descriptions are best avoided, *especially* in young adult literature. Teens read for plot, not for prose. My 13-year-old sister and other teens I’ve spoken to skip the “boring parts,” which are almost always the descriptions. Descriptions are the icing, and if you’ve ever eaten a jar of icing on its own, you know it only feels good at first.

On the other hand, teens love blue (profane or vulgar) language. (So do I.) It’s fun, funny, taboo, and often the way teenagers speak to one another. Raised by a mother who talks like a trucker, I have to check myself, when I speak and when I write, to ensure I don’t curse a…well, a blue streak. But fiction, and especially dialog, must be believable, which ironically is not always the same thing as true-to-life. At times “realistic’ teen dialog is so vulgar as to be distracting. And that’s the real problem with extreme language of any kind: it steals focus. I don’t want my readers thinking about my protagonist’s foul mouth when they should be thinking about her broken heart.

Today I struggled to tamp both purple and blue. In the scene I was working on, my protagonist and her boyfriend slip into the bushes for some hanky-panky. My first impulse was to pan away and describe the slowly spinning wheel of boyfriend’s bike as it glints in the sun. Yawn. Turning focus back to the kids, I found myself using the same blue language the characters themselves would have used to describe their actions, but the result was too graphic. I settled for skipping the play-by-play entirely and used suggestive post-romp details instead. This was the result:

They made it as far as Sweet Creek before a private path through the trees enticed them off the road. They let the bike fall with a crunch, the upended front wheel spinning freely. Twenty minutes later Cherry was brushing a mud stain from her slacks, and Lucas searched for his sock in the bushes.

            “You have leaves in your hair,” he said.

            “I have leaves everywhere.” She felt like a wild woods girl, a sprite. She wanted to climb into the nearest oak and fall asleep. She stretched, felt an ache above her solar plexus and winced.

How Do I Pub My Non-Fiction Book? Q&A

Some friends wrote with questions about publishing their commercial non-fiction project. Thought I’d share my answers with you all:

Should we find an agent or contact publishers ourselves?

Definitely find an agent first. For that you’ll need a book proposal, which should include a few sample chapters, an overview of your platform, any persons of note who might be tapped to write a forward, an outline of the book, your market, etc. Basically, a package describing what the book will be (with examples), who will buy it, and why.

 

How do we go about finding a trustworthy agent?

There are lots of resources online, and Writer’s Marketplace is a great print publication. You’ll want an agent specializing in commercial non-fiction. You might start by looking up who represents authors of books similar to yours (this info isn’t always public, but check the acknowledgements section, and usually the author mentions their agent).

 

As far as trustworthy agents go, Predators & Editors is an invaluable resource. They should not *pay* an agent to consider their book. In fact, they shouldn’t pay an agent anything until there’s a book deal. Standard percentage is 15%, and you want an agent who is an AAR member.

 

When we find one, what is generally the timeline to publishing a book?

Long. Assuming your first round of submissions lands you an agent: Agent considers for 30-60 days, finishing the book takes another 3 months, then revisions with the agent take another 3. Editors consider for 2 months, then more revisions, then an additional year (at least) of promotion, printing, etc, before the book hits the shelves. As far as $$$ is concerned, advances often run 1/2 on execution of the publishing agreement, 1/2 on acceptance by the Publisher of the final draft of the book. Sometimes a portion is reserved until the book is actually published.

 

Hope this helps!

 

Godspeed, pilgrims,

-J

 

Article in 2011 CWIM

Have you grabbed your copy yet? The Children’s Writer’s and Illustrator’s Market is what I always recommend to authors seeking agents and publishers. It’s a fabulous and exhaustive resource (you’ll find Scott Treimel NY on page 300).

This year, my article, “An Agent / Author’s Crash Course in Getting Published,” is among the pieces from agents, editors and major authors. It features such salient tips as:

1. Surviving awkward phone calls with potential publishers.

2. Taming your writing as you tame a 100-pound American Bulldog.

3. Getting past “No,” and the far more injurious, “Hmm…“

4. Coffee: infusing inspiration; removing stains.

A sample…

My career began with an American Bulldog. I’d climbed five flights to interview at S©ott Treimel NY, a boutique juvenile literary agency in the LaGrange Terrace penthouse at Astor Place. Five months previous I’d graduated college, set to dazzle the world with the profundity of metaphor in Russian literature. I wanted to be a novelist, and was also interested in the book business. Now, twenty interviews later, beat and red-eyed, I clasped my double-espresso like a scabbard and faced one hundred pounds of slobbering Cerberus. Its nametag read “Petey.”

My piece aside, this really is the guide. I always had one on my college book shelf. Go buy one!